As both human beings and lawyers, we see what we want to see. We see the pile of garbage on the side of the road or the flowers. We see the good in people, or we know the evil. We see events in our lives we like or are consumed by events we do not. We constantly make conscious or subconscious judgments that determine our experiences and control our happiness. The “switch” that determines whether we like what is happening is called judgment.
What If We Eliminated Judgment From Our Lives?
We are much more powerful than we think because we can control our perceptions and projections.
When we eliminate judgment, we start to see life from an objective, completely conscious viewpoint. Without judgment, nothing is better than anything else. We stop reacting to life; we witness life. We cease experiencing anger, fear, rejection, and other negative emotions that cause suffering. Everything is.
- So, how do we stop judging? Here are some suggestions.
- It Takes Radical and Rigorous Honesty
- First, you must admit to yourself when you are being judgmental and stop it.
It isn’t easy: Judgment is so deeply ingrained in our mental processes that it is like dandelion roots that keep growing back in the lawn of our thoughts. But when we rid ourselves of judgment, prejudices disappear, and we start to see people for who they truly are. Read More
Choose a Different Lens
When life gets traumatic and overwhelming, try looking at it differently.
Take a break from projects. Be still. Focus on a candle flame or your breathing. Imagine that you are a movie projector projecting your life and that you get to choose the lens on the projector. Pull out the lens of hope and see what you see. Pull out the lens of trust and know what you see.
You can have hope or fear, faith or doubt, trust or suspicion, and guilt. When you change from a lens of negativity to one of positivity, the world looks far different.
Projection Is a Mirror
When you suspect someone of inappropriate thoughts or behavior, you are likely projecting your inadequacies on them to suppress your own. For example, you suspect your spouse of cheating because you have feelings of infidelity. Or, you feel other people don’t like you when it is you who doesn’t want you. Take responsibility for your thoughts and feelings before judging someone else.
Empathy Is the Opposite of Projection
Judgment affects everything, creating the perceptions of good and bad, right and wrong, love and hate. When judgment is removed, those opposites disappear. When you try to understand what someone else is feeling and thinking, you reverse the psychic energy of projection. So, for example, when you identify with people you think don’t like you, you can stop projecting your self-loathing onto someone else and begin to understand who they are.
Is Judgment Preventing You From Being Happy?
Everyone believes in something. When you think that events in life happen “to” you, you can get stuck in victim mode, constantly anxious and afraid of what might happen next. This is what judgment does to you — or what we do to ourselves.
Digging deep under all the rationalizations that form your judgments and create your reality is hard work. Once you examine how your decisions limit you, you can let them go and allow yourself to relax and enjoy your life. You can easily learn how to stop judging and change your judgmentalism into something positive you do for yourself. You are that powerful.